It was on a Monday(Aug. 7, 2006) of this week that Jeremy Andrew [last name omitted] entered the world. He’s the son of two kids I’ve known since my first turn at the college thing. That’s about 10 years ago in groonk time.<\/p>\n
Now, they only call when something big happens like moving the the left coast or when they conspire to bring new life into the world. At this rate I figure the next time I hear from them will be Jam’s(my current nickname for the tyke) graduates top of his High School class or discovers the cure for the common idiot.<\/p>\n
7d tells me that Jenny(the mom) called him up a handful of hours after Jam left her womb whilst the father, who didn’t have to pass a small human through an even smaller orifice, lay sleeping nearby. Then, not but a day later, I got an email from Jenny including a picture of the new bundle of goodness. All I have to say to that is, ‘Andy, wtf, man? You’re gonna have to roll harder than that to keep up with your new son. Jam’s new mom is making calls and sending out emails a few hours after labor. And what are you doing? Sleeping the night away. Tsk tsk tsk.’<\/p>\n
All jokes aside, Congrats to the both of you!<\/p>\n
Welcome to the world, Jam. Whatever you’re gonna be, now or in the future, be the best at it. Presently that means being the best eating\/pooping machine and keeping your parents up at all hours of the night.<\/p>\n
Rock on, my little friend, and rock hard.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
It was on a Monday(Aug. 7, 2006) of this week that Jeremy Andrew [last name omitted] entered the world. He’s the son of two kids I’ve known since my first turn at the college thing. That’s about 10 years ago in groonk time. Now, they only call when something big happens like moving the the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[19],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-981","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-too-many-thoughts"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.groonk.net\/bits\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/981","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.groonk.net\/bits\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.groonk.net\/bits\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.groonk.net\/bits\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.groonk.net\/bits\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=981"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.groonk.net\/bits\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/981\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.groonk.net\/bits\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=981"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.groonk.net\/bits\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=981"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.groonk.net\/bits\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=981"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}