March 27, 2008
Girl Dies because Parents are Idiots
This is the one time when being an objectional journalist would get in my way.
An autopsy showed Madeline Neumann died Sunday from diabetic ketoacidosis, a condition that left too little insulin in her body, Everest Metro Police Chief Dan Vergin said.She had probably been ill for about a month, suffering symptoms such as nausea, vomiting, excessive thirst, loss of appetite and weakness, the chief said Wednesday, noting that he expects to complete the investigation by Friday and forward the results to the district attorney.
Well they obviously had something against their daughter. How could they sit by and watch their child waste away from something that was curable? It wasn't cancer or AIDS. It was a fucking curable affliction and their kid died because of their idiocy.
I seem to remember hearing this somewhere, "God helps those who help themselves."
God helps those who help themselves, you idiots.
(via 7d, googlenews)
Posted by Groonk at 05:07 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Religion
February 13, 2008
His Attention, You Now Have It
Jesus, is that a lip balm or are you happy to see...EVERYBODY?
The Yahoo page this was originally on seems to deny the product ever existed. Curious.
NPR reports the product was yanked from Singapore shelves after people complained about it. People don'tlike questionable marketing avenunes regarding their faith.
Sinagapore. Really. How long have you been on this Earth?
(via medicmike)
Posted by Groonk at 10:59 AM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Marketing, Religion
January 24, 2008
Ring Gun: Small. Stylish. Old. Deadly?
Also, it won't pass through Airport Security.
Duh.
Also of interest:
Watch Gun
Crucifix Gun
a fucking Hand Canon!
(via curio&antik, gizmodo)
Posted by Groonk at 02:02 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of History, Religion, Research, Technology, USA
January 03, 2008
LOLCat Bible Translation Project is "The Wonderful"
1 Oh hai. In teh beginnin Ceiling Cat maded teh skiez An da Urfs, but he did not eated dem.
2 Da Urfs no had shapez An haded dark face, An Ceiling Cat rode invisible bike over teh waterz.
3 At start, no has lyte. An Ceiling Cat sayz, i can haz lite? An lite wuz.
4 An Ceiling Cat sawed teh lite, to seez stuffs, An splitted teh lite from dark but taht wuz ok cuz kittehs can see in teh dark An not tripz over nethin.5 An Ceiling Cat sayed light Day An dark no Day. It were FURST!!!1
Try not to waste time there. I darez u.
And then tehre wuz Revelations:
"7 An i oppeneded nuther seal an 4th dood say "Come and lookz!"
8 Lo behold a pale horsez with a dood sitin on it, his naym wuz Deaths, an liek Hadez an stuff followd himz. Him had enuf skillz to kill lots of doodz, with antifreezez and curiositiez."
And shirtses fer wearin'.
(via P&P, lolcatbible, lolcat revelations)
Posted by Groonk at 06:56 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Funny, Intertube Madness, Religion
November 14, 2007
Some Jokes Write Themselves
(via 7d)
Posted by Groonk at 01:57 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Religion
October 13, 2007
Trials of the Knights Templars now in Book Form
It took 700 years for the information inside to be revealed.
A reproduction of the minutes of trials against the Templars, "'Processus Contra Templarios -- Papal Inquiry into the Trial of the Templars"' is a massive work and much more than a book -- with a 5,900 euros ($8,333) price tag.
"This is a milestone because it is the first time that these documents are being released by the Vatican, which gives a stamp of authority to the entire project," said Professor Barbara Frale, a medievalist at the Vatican's Secret Archives.
"Nothing before this offered scholars original documents of the trials of the Templars," she told Reuters in a telephone interview ahead of the official presentation of the work on October 25.
The epic comes in a soft leather case that includes a large-format book including scholarly commentary, reproductions of original parchments in Latin, and -- to tantalize Templar buffs -- replicas of the wax seals used by 14th-century inquisitors.
(via yahoo news)
Posted by Groonk at 01:03 AM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Books, Religion
September 24, 2007
Stephen Colbert Defies You to be Afraid
That man is Awesome and Win and Excellence personified.
"Not living in fear is a great gift, because certainly these days we do it so much. And do you know what i like about comedy? You can't laugh and be afraid at the same time--of anything. If you're laughing, I defy you to be afraid."
--Stephen Colbert, some Parade interview
(via ontd)
Posted by Groonk at 04:47 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Interviews, Just Freaking Neat, Religion
September 08, 2007
The Pope Says Things. I Foolishly Rant into the Night.
Pope Benedict rejected the concept that abortion could be considered a human right on Friday and urged European leaders to do everything possible to raise birth rates and make their countries more child-friendly.The 80-year-old German Pontiff told diplomats and representatives of international organizations that Europe could not deny its Christian roots because Christianity had played a decisive role in forging its history and culture.
"It was in Europe that the notion of human rights was first formulated. The fundamental human right, the presupposition of every other right, is the right to life itself," he said in an address at the former imperial Hofburg Palace.
Well that's a right fucking nice idea. Given that we(humanity) have not created a stable outpost elsewhere in the Solar System and new land is being created at below a snails pace: where exactly are you gonna put these extra people?
And where was the church when the slave trade was big business? When Buying and selling human beings was overlooked by the church during this time.
Just asking.
As for children friendly countries: I'm all for that. Keep on that track, please.
(via yahoo and my shoddy duck taped soapbox)
Posted by Groonk at 02:31 AM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Religion
August 24, 2007
Neopagan Group Worships Death. Wants Recognition
Curiously, their deity of choice has a remarkable resemblence to Death of the Endless. A small fact not missed by Death's creator.
A small religious group that worships the grim reaper and is fighting for government recognition unveiled a softer image of their Death Saint today: a woman with a porcelain face, brown, shoulder-length hair and long thin fingers.
Hundreds of worshippers filed into the Santa Muerte sanctuary in central Mexico City to see the statue in a flowing golden dress and veil, clutching a rose. She offers another option to followers who have traditionally prayed to figures of a skeleton dressed in a black cloak and carrying a scythe, or in a long flowing white gown.
David Romo, the Traditional Mex-USA Church's archbishop, said the new incarnation of the saint appeared to a woman in a dream in December and told her to ask Romo to commission a statue so devotees could see her new look.
He denied the change is a publicity stunt to win government recognition and shed the group's image as a cult dabbling in black magic.
Death came to him in a Dream, eh? Gaiman should sue for trademark infringement.
(via neil gaiman and brisbane times)
Posted by Groonk at 12:26 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Culture, Religion
June 02, 2007
A Little Girl Forced "Mike Seaver" to Tears
As I swung to the subject of God, a little Indian Buddhist girl stepped forward and said "So this is what you do now? You give people money so they'll stand here so you can brainwash them?!"
Little girl, I only call you "little girl" because I have no true or accurate description of what nationality you claim or which life philosophy you call your own, *you*, little girl, are *awesome*.
I hope you grow up and have an awesome life with awesome adventures and continue to tell others they are not as awesome as you.
For they clearly are not.
(via ontd and toasted pixel's guide to kirk cameron's new saviour site)
Posted by Groonk at 06:40 AM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Quotables, Religion
April 04, 2007
Chocolate Jesus and Peanut Butter Evolution
Those are two things I never figured on typing in my lifetime.
(You thought I would make that joke didn't you? Fooled ya!)
Artist Cosimo Cavallaro's 200 pound, milk chocolate sculpture of Christ was to be exhibited next week at Manhattan's Lab Gallery but the Roger Smith Hotel that houses the exhibition space cancelled the show
(via boingboing)
The video explains that evolutionists claim that energy plus matter sometimes results in the creation of life. But since no one has ever found spontaneously-generated life in a jar of peanut butter, that means that matter plus energy from the sun couldn't have caused life on Earth.
(via boingboing)
Correct me if I'm wrong but that's what we in The Biz call a fallacy. Also, your stupidity is mighty and I fear being quashed by the sheer size of it.
(via boingboing)
Posted by Groonk at 12:34 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Art, Religion, Video, Weird
Louis Theroux Chats with the most Hateful Family in America
This family pickets funerals of soldiers that have died in the current Iraq War. They picket the mourners and say that all the bad things that are happening is because it is God's revenge on the US for tolerating homosexuality.
...
If I ever find them picketing a funeral of anybody I'm familiar with, my wrath would strike without prejudice. They would write songs about what I do to each and every one of those hateful bastards.
What else do you tackle in the film?What we're trying to do in the documentary is look at an activity that is so antisocial, so strange, so futile and at its worst, so cruel, and we're saying "Why? Why do that?", especially when you seem to be, for the most part, kind and sensitive people. We're exploring what is cruelty, trying to explain how something that really does very often just amount to cruelty could be perpetuated and passed down in a family. Why would nice people do such horrible things?
Do you think you've come to an answer?
Yes, I think we do. I think that the pastor is not a very nice person. I think he's an angry person who's twisted the Bible and picked and chosen verses that support his anger, that sort of justify his anger, and he's instilled that in his children and they've passed it on to their children. Although the second and third generation are by and large quite nice people from what I saw, they still live under the influence of their Gramps.
(via bbc news)
Posted by Groonk at 10:25 AM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Interviews, Religion, USA, War
March 11, 2007
A Meeting in the Morning
(via ponzu)
Posted by Groonk at 11:31 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Photos2, Religion
January 29, 2007
Christian Web Site Lists Dead Rockstars
(view the list without the propaganda at ONTD. list with propaganda here)
Posted by Groonk at 08:39 AM | Comments (0) | Ministry of People Who Died, Religion
January 10, 2007
Jinn: Born from the Smokeless Fire
Gaiman linked to this quite nice article talking about the Jinn's(or genie's for the western layperson) place in history and contemporary times. The whole article is worth reading and knowing.
The Bible holds that God created angels and then made man in his own image. The Koran states that Allah fashioned angels from light and then made jinn from smokeless fire. Man was formed later, out of clay. Jinn disappointed Allah, not least by climbing to the highest vaults of the sky and eavesdropping on the angels. Yet Allah did not annihilate them. No flood closed over their heads. Jinn were willed into existence, like man, to worship Allah and were preserved on earth for that purpose, living in a parallel world, set at such an angle that jinn can see men, but men cannot see jinn.[...]
In Somalia and Afghanistan clerics matter-of-factly described to your correspondent the range of jinn they had encountered, from the saintly to the demonic; those that can fly, those that crawl, plodding jinn, invisible jinn, gul with vampiric tendencies (from which the English word ghoul is taken), and shape-shifters recognisable in human form because their feet are turned backwards. Occasionally the clerics fell into a trance. Afterwards they claimed their apparently bare rooms had filled with jinn seeking favours or release from amulet charms.
[...]
But to more scholarly clerics jinn are little more than an energy, a pulse form of quantum physics perhaps, alive at the margins of sleep or madness, and more often in the whispering of a single unwelcome thought. An extension of this electric description of jinn is that they are not beings at all but thoughts that were in the world before the existence of man. Jinn reflect the sensibilities of those imagining them, just as in Assyrian times they were taken to be the spirits responsible for manias, who melted into the light at dawn.
(via neil gaiman and economist.com)
Posted by Groonk at 07:31 AM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Just Freaking Neat, Myth, Religion, Research
January 04, 2007
VILLAIN Dupe OF THE WEEK: Me Grand Canyon National Park Service*
Hero of the Week began here. it's only fitting that Villain of the Week does the same. For what are Heroes without Villains?
Strangers running about in tights enforcing their facist regimes, is what.
Take for instance the Grand Canyon's Park Service:
HOW OLD IS THE GRAND CANYON? PARK SERVICE WON’T SAY — Orders to Cater to Creationists Makes National Park Agnostic on GeologyWashington, DC — Grand Canyon National Park is not permitted to give an official estimate of the geologic age of its principal feature, due to pressure from Bush administration appointees. Despite promising a prompt review of its approval for a book claiming the Grand Canyon was created by Noah's flood rather than by geologic forces, more than three years later no review has ever been done and the book remains on sale at the park, according to documents released today by Public Employees for Environmental Responsibility (PEER).
“In order to avoid offending religious fundamentalists, our National Park Service is under orders to suspend its belief in geology,” stated PEER Executive Director Jeff Ruch. “It is disconcerting that the official position of a national park as to the geologic age of the Grand Canyon is ‘no comment.’”
In a letter released today, PEER urged the new Director of the National Park Service (NPS), Mary Bomar, to end the stalling tactics, remove the book from sale at the park and allow park interpretive rangers to honestly answer questions from the public about the geologic age of the Grand Canyon. PEER is also asking Director Bomar to approve a pamphlet, suppressed since 2002 by Bush appointees, providing guidance for rangers and other interpretive staff in making distinctions between science and religion when speaking to park visitors about geologic issues.
Again with the silly...no... incredibly ignorant shit from The PTBs. No worries, I'm not going into some pointless internet rant on the stupidity of those who can't separate life enriching faith from boneheaded theological totalitarianism.I mean, what would be the point in that?
I prefer to think of the Grand canyon as a sophisticated lady hiding her age from gentlemen callers. Hey Lady Canyon, you're gonna have to reveal yourself under that 1000 watt one day. You can't hide behind lies forever.
Just sayin.
UPDATE: It seems that all this noise was bullshit printed by overzealous environmentalist fuckos PEER. Thanks to Gaiman for pointing it out. And instead of ignoring my dupability, I'm just striking through the bad bits. Next time I'll do some small research on my own.
(link via 7d and PEER)
(*Technically, the current regime is the true villain but their plate is so full of badness that everyone has to share.)
Posted by Groonk at 12:40 AM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Politics, Religion
November 30, 2006
When Cthulhu comes for Us All, There's Only One Way to Go
The credit to this parody belongs to Howard Hallis. May his genius continue to enlighten.
Some cultural-studies type ought to do a book on the way that the Cthulhu mythos has oozed forth from its pulp origins to become Western pop culture’s generic Nightmare From Beyond. This parody could have been written thirty years ago — Chick goes back that far and has been remarkably, er, consistent in his output — but thirty years ago only a handful of SF and fantasy fans would have recognized Cthulhu. Nowadays ol’ squid-face is all over the place; there are, ironically, plush toys.
I put it down to fantasy-role-playing games, which have reached a far larger audience than print SF or fantasy. Gamers have borrowed the Cthulhu mythos so frequently that it’s a cliché — but one which, thanks to the eerie power of Lovecraft’s imagery, never completely loses its power to send a chill down the spine. Even the mere names — the Necronomicon, Yog-Sothoth, the corpse-eaters of Leng, the Hounds of Tindalos, and of course dread Cthulhu himself — is to feel a vast and threatening darkness.
Hallis’s parody draws on a much more specific tradition. The idea of the Campus Crusade for Cthulhu as a parody of the Campus Crusade for Christ was already live when I was in college in the 1970s. But Hallis makes their point more compactly and effectively, and therein lies the real touch of genius in this piece.
Jack T. Chick’s pamphlets speak plainly the most fundamental message of Christian evangelism: believe or be damned. It’s all about fear, the induced fear that if you don’t get straight with God you will burn in Hell. Not for Chick the sugar-coating of talk about love or morality or becoming a better person. Writing for the lowest common denominator, he zeroes in on terror.
Where is the comic in its entirety?
Right here.
Check out the Galactus Jack Chick tract for more parody. It's not as delicious as the Cthulhu for Christ parody, but it's just as funny.
(via neil gaiman and armed and dangerous and YMB)
Posted by Groonk at 02:05 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Comics, Religion
November 26, 2006
Something Evil Lurks in Her Belly
A doctor at a family planning clinic told a patient that she needed an exorcism because there was something sinister moving around inside her stomach, a medical tribunal was told yesterday.Joyce Pratt, 44, allegedly told the patient, who was seeking contraceptive advice, that she might be possessed by an evil spirit and needed religious rather than medical help.
She gave the woman crosses and trinkets to ward off black magic, allegedly told her that her mother was a witch, that she and her husband were trying to kill her, and suggested that she visit a Roman Catholic priest at Westminster Cathedral in London.
Welcome back from Thanksgiving. Is the evil still in your bellies too?
(via warren ellis)
Posted by Groonk at 10:10 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Religion
November 04, 2006
In Japan, Christian Weddings are All the Rage
BBC News is slow. They are only now reporting on the business of being a fake priest in Japan.
With a rise in the popularity of Christian-style weddings in Japan, some Westerners are finding they can make a lucrative living by acting as priests. But it does not please everyone, particularly genuine priests, as Kathleen McCaul reports.[...]
The fake Western priests are employed at Western-style weddings to give a performance and add to the atmosphere. These are not legal ceremonies - the couples also have to make a trip to the local registrar.
"In the past almost all weddings in Japan were Shinto, but in the last few years Western-style weddings have appeared and become very popular," said one Japanese priest.
"People like the dress, the kiss and the image. Japanese Christians make up only 1% of the country, but now about 90% of weddings are in the Christian style."
The fake Western priests are used to create an authentic Christian feel.
I read many years ago on, then living in Tokyo, Canadian photographer Hunkabutta's photoblog about this phenomenom. He talks about his experience as a fake priest in excellent detail here:
Hunkabutta Thursday April 3rd, 2003(Scroll down to about the last entry)
Hunkabutta's opinion on the popularity of the fake christian weddings were because in a christian wedding it's all about the bride. In a Shinto wedding, not so much. He talks more about that on his Sunday September 23, 2003 post. Here's an excerpt:
"The fact that you said 'Christian weddings are trendy' seems more bizarre to me than 'Disneyland wedding'..."Yeah, I know. It is bizarre. The Japanese seem to have the ability to mix and match religions at will. At first glance this seems ridiculously contradictory, but once you accept it, it's actually pretty cool. They seem to be able to focus on the social aspects of the various ceremonies and sacraments (i.e., who's there, how do I get to mingle with other people, what message does this ceremony send out to other people about me and my family, can I afford to do these ceremonies, etc.)
Christian-style weddings started to become popular in the early 1980's after a famous singer (kind of like a Japanese Madonna) had her Christian-style wedding aired on TV. It was a big event. A few years later there was the incredibly glamorous wedding of Prince Charles and Lady Diana, and that was really the icing on the cake.
[...]
I think that one of the reasons the Christian-style wedding is so popular is that it's all centred around the bride. She is the star for the day. Everyone stands and watches her as she makes her way down the aisle in her beautiful white wedding gown. In a Shinto ceremony, the bride is pretty much just a well dressed farm animal being passed from one family to the other. She doesn't really stand out. And let's face it, although most guys will agree to show up at the wedding, it's really the girl who puts it all together and makes the final decision.
From that first hyperlinked sentence alone I know I need to live in Tokyo for a few years. And bonus, I'd have an excellent well paid part-time gig waiting for me.
(via bbc news and warren ellis and the greatly missed photographic eye of Hunkabutta)
Posted by Groonk at 03:16 AM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Only in Japan, Religion
November 03, 2006
Letters to God Found, Unanswered, on Jersey Shore
Should they be advertising what those folks wrote in the letters? I mean...really.
Some of the letters are comical (a man asking God to let him win the lottery, twice), others are heartbreaking (a distraught teen asking forgiveness for an abortion, an unwed mother pleading with God to make the baby's father marry her). The letters — about 300 in all, sent to a New Jersey minister — ended up dumped in the ocean, most of them unopened.The minister died two years ago at 79. How the letters, some dating to 1973, wound up bobbing in the surf is a mystery.
"There are hundreds of lives here, a lot of struggle, washed up on the beach," said Bill Lacovara, a Ventnor insurance adjuster who was fishing last month with his son when he spotted a flowered plastic shopping bag and waded out to retrieve it. "This is just a hint of what really happens. How many letters like this all over the world aren't being opened or answered?"
Many of the letters were addressed to the Rev. Grady Cooper, though many more simply said "Altar." According to the text of several of them, they were intended to be placed on a church's altar and prayed over by the minister, the congregation or both.
(via yahoo news)
Posted by Groonk at 07:26 AM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Religion, USA
October 30, 2006
Nazi Home Movie Found in Church
A 10-minute home movie made by Nazi officers during World War II has been found in a church in rural Devon.It shows members of the SS running a slave labour camp in southern Russia. In the footage, troops force prisoners to work and officers are seen relaxing.
No one is sure how the film came to be stored at Cullompton Baptist Church but historians say it is unique.
[...]
"It looks very much like this is something somebody shot to show where they are working to take home to show the wife and kids."
Fuck zombies, werewolves, aliens and all that noise. People are the scariest monsters on Earth.
(via bbc news and warren ellis)
Posted by Groonk at 12:37 AM | Comments (0) | Ministry of History, Religion, WorldWarII
October 07, 2006
Limbo is Going to Hell
Most people don't cotton to the idea of little babies being left to the nethers just because they had the misfortune of dying young(before they could be baptised).
Apparently, the idea of limbo has not been taught since the early 1990s. And now the current pope will simply "do away" with it:
The Pope may be about to abolish the notion of limbo, the halfway house between heaven and hell, inhabited by unbaptised infants. Is it really that simple?
Pope Benedict XVI's anticipated pronouncement on limbo will have been informed by the International Theological Commission - a group of leading Roman Catholic theologians who have been meeting to consider the issue.
The Pope, himself, has been quoted in the past as saying that he would let the idea of limbo "drop, since it has always been only a theological hypothesis".
He was quoted as saying that limbo has never been a "definitive truth of the faith".
[...]
It was Abelard who introduced the idea of limbo. The word comes from the Latin "limbus", meaning the edge. This would be a state of existence where unbaptised babies, and those unfortunate enough to have been born before Jesus, would not experience pain but neither would they experience the Beatific Vision of God.
(via warren ellis)
Posted by Groonk at 01:20 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Religion
September 19, 2006
Today is the Day to be Touched by His Noodley Appendage
Why today? You're just not paying attention are you?
Posted by Groonk at 05:14 AM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Culture, Funny, Religion
September 18, 2006
Evangelism Hits the World Stage of Being Meddlesome Towards Evolution
Evangelical Christians in Kenya are demanding that the exhibit at Nairobi's National Museum edit out references to human evolution in order to prevent young African Christians from being taught falsehoods.
[...]
It's not the exhibit itself the alliance opposes, Adoyo told Wired News, but rather its interpretation. A satisfactory solution, he said, would be to remove the words that would classify the fossils as "scientific evidence," displaying them instead as a history of other creatures, without connecting them to human beings.
"When you use evolution as God's tool in creating man in his image, you have to reckon with the fact at what stage in the evolution process does man attain to that image?" he said. "The conclusion is either God's image is evolving or God Himself is evolving or every creature has God's image. God could be anything and I'm afraid I cannot put my faith in a 'changing God' or an 'anything God'.”
(via wired news)
Posted by Groonk at 05:37 AM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Religion, Research, Science
August 15, 2006
God's Tree? Maybe. God's Water. Definitely?
Her son, Lloyd, 47, discovered water leaking from the tree in April. He said it was cool, like it came from the tap.
The only damp spot around the tree trunk is where the water lands.
Mark Peterson, a regional community forester from the Texas Forest Service said he believes it could be a spring, but pointed out that would be rare with the drought conditions this summer.
"If it is a burst pipe their monthly bill would be enormous," Peterson said.
Lucille Pope has started to wonder if the water has special properties.
Her insurance agent dabbed drops of the water on a spider bite and the welt went away, she said.
If the water came from a stone, then we'd have something.
Like a fountain.
(via warren ellis)
Posted by Groonk at 11:25 AM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Religion, Weird
When I Watched "Keep your Jesus off My Penis" I Found Myself Amused
Eric Schwartz is a funny man and he makes me laugh.
I swear, no more videos today.
(via wondermuss YouTube)
Posted by Groonk at 04:53 AM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Funny, Music, Politics, Religion
July 26, 2006
A Miracle was Found in an Irish Bog
Archeologists in Ireland are treating the finding of an ancient book of psalms unearthed from bogland as a miracle.
The book was discovered by a man digging peat from the bog with a backhoe.
"This is really a miracle find," said Pat Wallace, director of the National Museum of Ireland, which has the book stored in refrigeration.
He is one of a team of manuscript experts who spoke about the discovery on Tuesday.
"There's two sets of odds that make this discovery really way out," said Wallace. "First of all, it's unlikely that something this fragile could survive buried in a bog at all, and then for it to be unearthed and spotted before it was destroyed is incalculably more amazing."
The book has about 20 pages and experts believe it was written by monks between 800 and 1000 AD.
Posted by Groonk at 09:26 AM | Comments (0) | Ministry of History, Religion
June 07, 2006
FACT: Lions are "Godless Killing Machines"
Colbert thinks it's the bears that are dangerous. This man from Kiev proves the bears have competition.
"A lioness went straight for him, knocked him down and severed his carotid artery."
The incident, Sunday evening when the zoo was packed with visitors, was the first of its kind at the attraction. Lions and tigers are kept in an "animal island" protected by thick concrete blocks.
You gotta be hating life something awful lot to swim to an island, crawl into a lion enclosure, and shout grandiose challenges to the heavens. Other folks jump in front of trains or overdose on over-the-counter sleepy pills. Not that guy. Some would say that he spit in the face of the Almighty and the Almighty blinked. I say that lioness simply had a taste for fools.
(via 7d via myway)
Posted by Groonk at 01:20 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Animals, Religion, Weird
June 05, 2006
Pat Robertson is Gamma Charged
Pat Robertson claimed he can leg press 2,000 pounds. If that's true that'd make him the Hulk of his collective. The Samson of his parish.
Color me dubious:
"One Saturday morning, his physician said, 'I'll get you bragging rights. Let¹s go to 2,000 pounds.' Then he worked up multiple reps of 1,400 pounds, 1,500 pounds, 1,600 pounds, 1,700 pounds, 1,800 pounds and 1,900 pounds. When 2,000 pounds was put on the machine two men got on either side and helped push the load up, and then let it down on Mr. Robertson, who pushed it up one rep and let it go back down again.
"Mr. Robertson warms up now at 500 pounds, and was shown on television with Kristi Watts doing 1,000 pounds.
Gods! Either Pat Robertson is tough enough to take down bears with nothing but his thumb and a can full of green substance or there is more in those protein shakes than than he's tellin'.
(via dunc! and wonkette)
Posted by Groonk at 06:22 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Religion, Weird
May 20, 2006
The Tale of the Talking Fish
It's rare that I hear of a thing having religious symbology found on it that doesn't involve Jesus or the Virgin Mary.
A fish with markings that resembled a Koranic text has been found by Kenyan officials after vanishing from the fisheries office where it was stored.
The fish was found at the shop where it had first come to public attention.
The fish was being studied to find out if the Arabic inscription "You are the best provider" was natural or a hoax.
Sceptics say the writing was the work of someone who caught the fish and then threw it back into the sea.
But others say this would be impossible, and local imams are said to have been talking in the mosques about the fish.
[...]
The text is close to the Koranic verse: "Wa anta khair al-raziqin"
(via boingboing)
Posted by Groonk at 01:07 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Religion
May 19, 2006
Ian McKellen made me laugh
Broadcasting from the Cannes Film Festival, Lauer addressed the cast:
"People wanted this to say 'Fiction fiction fiction!' How would you have all felt if there was a disclaimer at the beginning of the movie? Would it have been okay with you?"
McKellan went on to say he found the Bible "somewhat preachy" and called the ending "a bit of a downer."
Gandalf/Magento gets cool points from me.
(via oh no they didn't)
Posted by Groonk at 02:06 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Quotables, Religion
May 03, 2006
The Case of the Singing Church
ROSSLYN Chapel holds many secrets. For hundreds of years experts and visitors alike have puzzled over the carvings in the chapel. Whilst some debate whether they point to hidden treasure, Edinburgh composer Stuart Mitchell thinks he has cracked one part of the enigma.
He believes that the ornate ceiling of carved arches, featuring 213 decorated cubes holds a code for medieval music. His father Thomas Mitchell spent 20 years cracking this code in the ceiling and now Stuart is orchestrating the findings for a new recording called The Rosslyn Motet.
[you can hear this on the main news site]
They hope that the music, when played on medieval instruments in situ, will resonate throughout the chapel unlocking a secret in the stone.
The breakthrough to interpreting the notation came when Mitchell's father discovered that the markings carved on the face of the cubes seem to match a phenomenon called Cymatics or Chladni patterns. Chladni patterns form when a sustained note is used to vibrate a sheet of metal covered in powder producing marks. The frequency used dictates the shape of the pattern, for example; the musical note A below middle C vibrates at 440 KHz and produces a shape that looks like a rhombus. Different notes can produce various shapes including flowers, diamonds and hexagons - shapes all present on the Rosslyn cubes. Stuart Mitchell believes this is "beyond coincidence" and has assigned a note to each cube.
Ernst Chladni first documented the phenomenon in the late 18th century - yet it appears to be present in a 15th century building. Which begs the question: "Was Sir William St Clair (the man who built Rosslyn Chapel) familiar with sciences far in advance of his time?".
Stuart Mitchell believes a link between the Knights Templar – who may have gleaned advanced Eastern scientific knowledge during their stay in Jerusalem during the Crusades – and Rosslyn could explain the encoded musical notes.
"The symbolism in Rosslyn is reaching back to times of a civilisation that is lost to us now that had sciences that are the roots of all the mechanics of the universe," says Mitchell.
If this science was used in the carvings at Rosslyn, then there needs to be an explanation of how this information came to be lost for centuries. According to Mitchell, the Church suppressed the knowledge as a means of controlling the public. "What it points towards is the church system denying people certain knowledge because knowledge is awareness. People who knew too much were burnt as witches."
(via warren ellis)
Posted by Groonk at 09:33 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Just Freaking Neat, Music, Religion, Research
April 24, 2006
Ex-Cardinal says Condoms may be "a lesser evil"
[...]
The Vatican says abstinence is the best way to tackle HIV/Aids.
But last week, a retired archbishop backed the use of condoms for married couples to prevent Aids transmission.
Damn. Never thought that'd happen. A step into the secular world. A small slightly, retarded baby step.
There is still something very odd about a man who does not and cannot have sex translating to other people what they should do in their sex lives.
(via bbc news)
Posted by Groonk at 03:14 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Religion, Sex
April 13, 2006
China gathers World's Buddhists in One Spot
It's for a meet-and-greet, of sorts. A forum:
Buddhists from more than 30 countries are in China for the World Buddhist Forum - communist China's first international religious gathering.
Hundreds of monks and scholars are visiting the eastern city of Hangzhou, but Buddhist spiritual leader, the Dalai Lama, has not been invited.
China regards the exiled Tibetan leader as a separatist.
It has made its choice of Panchen Lama - Tibet's second most important figure - the figurehead of the conference.
But according to Reuters news agency he appeared to be shunned by delegates.
Fellow Buddhists made no attempt to greet Gyaltsen Norbu during greeting ceremonies ahead of the conference on Wednesday, the agency reported.
The Dalai Lama has nominated his own Panchen Lama, who has disappeared and is believed to be under house arrest.
China appointed Gyaltsen Norbu in his place in 1995.
[...]
China said it did not want the Dalai Lama to "disharmonise" the forum, which opens on Thursday and runs until Sunday.
"The Dalai Lama is not only a religious figure, but is also a long-time stubborn secessionist who has tried to split his Chinese motherland and break the unity among different ethnic groups," said Qi Xiaofei, vice-director of the state administration for religious affairs.
But China is trying to thaw relations with religious establishments, including the Vatican, our correspondent says.
(via bbc news)
Posted by Groonk at 08:28 AM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Religion
April 05, 2006
Jesus Walked on Ice
What an excellent band name that would be. "Jesus Walked on Ice" now playing at the Hippodrome.
On to the article:
In what is now northern Israel, such ice could have formed on the cold freshwater surface of the Sea of Galilee -- known as Lake Kinneret by modern-day Israelis -- when already chilly temperatures briefly plummeted during one of the two protracted cold periods between 2,500 and 1,500 years ago.
A frozen patch floating on the surface of the small lake would have been difficult to distinguish from the unfrozen water surrounding it. The unfrozen water was comprised of the plumes resulting from salty springs situated along the lake's western shore in Tabgha -- an area where many archeological findings related to Jesus have been documented.
"As natural scientists, we simply explain that unique freezing processes probably happened in that region only a handful of times during the last 12,000 years," Nof said. "We leave to others the question of whether or not our research explains the biblical account."
It isn't the first time the FSU researcher has offered scientific explanations of watery miracles. As a recognized expert in the field of oceanography and limnology -- the study of freshwater, saline and brackish environments -- Nof made waves worldwide in 1992 with his oceanographic perspective on the parting of the Red Sea.
Heh.
(via warren ellis)
Posted by Groonk at 03:41 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Religion, Science
April 02, 2006
Prayer. Not helpful for healing.
A scientific analysis on the efficacy of prayer on heart bypass patients was conducted.
The patients in the study at six U.S. hospitals included 604 who were actually prayed for after being told they might or might not be; another 597 patients who were not prayed for after being told they might or might not be; and a group of 601 who were prayed for and told they would be the subject of such prayer.
The praying was done by members of three Christian groups in monasteries and elsewhere -- two Catholic and one Protestant -- who were given written prayers and the first name and initial of the last name of the prayer subjects. The prayers started on the eve of or day of surgery and lasted for two weeks.
Among the first group -- who were prayed for but only told they might be -- 52 percent had post-surgical complications compared to 51 percent in the second group, the ones who were not prayed for though told they might be. In the third group, who knew they were being prayed for, 59 percent had complications.
After 30 days, however, the death rates and incidence of major complications was about the same across all three groups, said the study published in the American Heart Journal.
(via boingboing)
Posted by Groonk at 05:29 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Religion
March 23, 2006
Best. Masthead. Ever!
Custom T-shirt blogger Preshrunk's Jason Cosper has the best personal blog masthead I've ever seen.
Posted by Groonk at 01:49 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Art, Blogged, Funny, Religion
March 15, 2006
Daily Show Read: Misquoting Jesus
The popular perception of the Bible as a divinely perfect book receives scant support from Ehrman, who sees in Holy Writ ample evidence of human fallibility and ecclesiastical politics. Though himself schooled in evangelical literalism, Ehrman has come to regard his earlier faith in the inerrant inspiration of the Bible as misguided, given that the original texts have disappeared and that the extant texts available do not agree with one another. Most of the textual discrepancies, Ehrman acknowledges, matter little, but some do profoundly affect religious doctrine. To assess how ignorant or theologically manipulative scribes may have changed the biblical text, modern scholars have developed procedures for comparing diverging texts.
Posted by Groonk at 12:27 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Books, Religion
February 27, 2006
Millionaire former marine wants to build Jesustown, USA
What a horrifying/fascinating endeavour.
Why horrifying? Pick up any old history textbook that focuses on The Middle Ages. Drop it on the floor and start reading.
Why fascinating? Damn, man. it just is.
Abortions, pornography and contraceptives will be banned in the new Florida town of Ave Maria, which has begun to take shape on former vegetable farms 90 miles northwest of Miami.
Great Maker, who would live there!?
(via warren ellis)
Posted by Groonk at 03:50 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Religion, Research, USA
February 21, 2006
DNA evidence vs Mormon scripture
Boingboing reported on a LA Times article about DNA and Mormon scripture. For a good clip, decades for those counting, the Church of Latter-day Saints has been successfully converting Native Americans and Pacific Islanders to Mormon belief because Mormon missionaries claimed they were the decedents of a blessed lost tribe of Israel.
Recent DNA tests point to the idea that Pacific Islanders and Native Americans are of Asian descent. Not Middle Eastern. Asian.
Times excerpt on the birth of Mormonism as written by what BB ascribed as a "racist Harry Potter fan":
God provided the 22-year-old Smith with a pair of glasses and seer stones that allowed him to translate the "Reformed Egyptian" writings on the golden plates into the "Book of Mormon: Another Testament of Jesus Christ."
Mormons believe these scriptures restored the church to God's original vision and left the rest of Christianity in a state of apostasy.
The book's narrative focuses on a tribe of Jews who sailed from Jerusalem to the New World in 600 BC and split into two main warring factions.
The God-fearing Nephites were "pure" (the word was officially changed from "white" in 1981) and "delightsome." The idol-worshiping Lamanites received the "curse of blackness," turning their skin dark.
According to the Book of Mormon, by 385 AD the dark-skinned Lamanites had wiped out other Hebrews. The Mormon church called the victors "the principal ancestors of the American Indians." If the Lamanites returned to the church, their skin could once again become white.
Times excerpt on apologists for the Mormon scripture:
"It would be a virtual certainly that their DNA would be swamped," said Daniel Peterson, a professor of Near Eastern studies at Brigham Young University in Provo, Utah, part of the worldwide Mormon educational system, and editor of a magazine devoted to Mormon apologetics. "And if that is the case, you couldn't tell who was a Lamanite descendant."
Last Times excerpt:
"I'm willing to live in ambiguity. I don't get that bothered by things I can't resolve in a week."
For others, living with ambiguity has been more difficult. Phil Ormsby, a Polynesian who lives in Brisbane, Australia, grew up believing he was a Hebrew.
"I visualized myself among the fighting Lamanites and lived out the fantasies of the [Book of Mormon] as I read it," Ormsby said. "It gave me great mana [prestige] to know that these were my true ancestors."
The DNA studies have altered his feelings completely.
"Some days I am angry, and some days I feel pity," he said. "I feel pity for my people who have become obsessed with something that is nothing but a hoax."
That last excerpt is simply "delightsome".
(via boingboing)
Posted by Groonk at 07:58 AM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Religion, Science
January 23, 2006
Android 8 has Space Jesus
Mentioned here before, Android 8 has a cool vinyl toy Jesus for sale.
(via android 8)
Posted by Groonk at 10:12 AM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Just Freaking Neat, Religion
The Pope. Now with copyrights!
The edict covers Pope Benedict XVI’s first encyclical, which is to be issued this week amid huge international interest. The edict is retroactive, covering not only the writings of the present pontiff — as Pope and as cardinal — but also those of his predecessors over the past 50 years. It therefore includes anything written by John Paul II, John Paul I, Paul VI and John XXIII.
The decision was denounced yesterday for treating the Pope’s words as “saleable merchandise” and endangering the Church’s mission to “spread the Christian message”.
(via boingboing)
Posted by Groonk at 08:50 AM | Comments (2) | Ministry of Marketing, Religion
December 20, 2005
"Breathtaking Inanity" avoided, 'intelligent design' not to be taught in class
"We have concluded that it is not [science], and moreover that ID cannot uncouple itself from its creationist, and thus religious, antecedents," Jones writes in his 139-page opinion posted on the court's Web site. (Opinion, pdf)
"To be sure, Darwin's theory of evolution is imperfect. However, the fact that a scientific theory cannot yet render an explanation on every point should not be used as a pretext to thrust an untestable alternative hypothesis grounded in religion into the science classroom or to misrepresent well-established scientific propositions," Jones writes.
Intelligent design claims the complexity of some systems of nature cannot be explained by evolution but must be attributed to a designer or supernatural being.
The Dover Area School District, about 25 miles from the state capital, sought to become the first in the nation to require high school science teachers to teach the concept of intelligent design as an alternative to Darwin's theory of evolution.
Jones described the school board's decision as "breathtaking inanity."
"Because Darwin's Theory is a theory, it continues to be tested as new evidence is discovered. The theory is not a fact," said the statement that the old school board approved in a 6-3 vote in October 2004. "With respect to any theory, students are encouraged to keep an open mind."
Wow. There really is a Santa Claus and, so far, I'm getting everything I wanted.
(via cnn)
Posted by Groonk at 04:05 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Religion, USA
December 15, 2005
Jesus made me laugh
jesus? it's me, groonk.
Why did I laugh? Cause Jesus laughed at that fool weasel owl.
He's like 'You know it's me, foo. let me in.'
And the weasel's all high and hiding behind doors and like, 'Really?!'
And Jesus laughed at the weasel cause addicts are funny.
Posted by Groonk at 08:14 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Avatarem, Religion
December 06, 2005
The Bible's Totally Erotic and Available in Calendars
"There's a whole range of biblical scriptures simply bursting with eroticism," said Stefan Wiest, the 32-year-old photographer who took the titillating pictures.
Anne Rohmer, 21, poses on a doorstep in garters and stockings as the prostitute Rahab, who is mentioned in both New and Old Testaments. "We wanted to represent the Bible in a different way and to interest young people," she told Reuters.
"Anyway, it doesn't say anywhere in the Bible that you are forbidden to show yourself nude."
Bernd Grasser, pastor of the church in Nuremberg where the calendar is being sold, was enthusiastic about the project which is explained online at www.bibelkalender.de.
"It's just wonderful when teenagers commit themselves with their hair and their skin to the bible," he said.
Oh, I would've had photos but the site they offer up is totally blank.
(via 7d)
Posted by Groonk at 01:22 PM | Comments (2) | Ministry of Religion, Sex
Geomythology: Saving lives with Folklore
This is some damn interesting shit:
But the memorial's main job is not to commemorate the disaster, which has only just come to light, but to warn local people that similar devastation could strike at any time.
The area sits over massive fault lines whose dangers have been highlighted by a startling new scientific discipline that combines Earth science studies and analysis of ancient legends. This is geomythology, and it is transforming our knowledge of earthquakes, volcanoes and tsunamis, says the journal Science.
According to the discipline's proponents, violent geological upheavals may be more frequent than was previously suspected.
Apart from the 'lost' Seattle earthquake, geomythology has recently revealed that a volcano in Fiji, thought to be dormant, is active, a discovery that followed geologists' decision to follow up legends of a mountain appearing overnight.
Geologists have found that Middle Eastern flooding myths, including the story of Noah, could be traced to the sudden inundation of the Black Sea 7,600 years ago. The Oracle at Delphi has been found to lie over a geological fault through which seeped hallucinogenic gases. These could account for the trances and utterances of the oracle's mystics.
'Myths can tell us a great deal about what happened in the past and were important in establishing what happened here 300 years ago,' said Brian Atwater, of the US Geological Survey in Seattle.
(via warren ellis)
These stories were a key influence on Atwater, who started to study the 680-mile long Cascadia subduction zone fault along the coast. What he found provided a shock. Long stretches had suffered sudden inundation relatively recently.
The study of trees stumps in this drowned landscape indicated there had been a huge earthquake and a tsunami between 1680 and 1720. 'We didn't know whether it was one massive quake or a couple of slightly smaller ones. Nor did we know exactly when the disaster occurred,' added Atwater.
Later research on tree rings put the date at between 1699 and 1700. Then local legends helped again. Japanese colleagues studied their records and traced an orphan tsunami - a giant wave not linked to a local earthquake - that destroyed several villages on 27 January, 1700.
'That told us two things: that our earthquake must have been vast, Richter scale 9, to devastate part of Japan thousands of miles away. It also gave us a precise date for our disaster.'
Scientists now believe huge earthquakes and tsunamis devastate the Seattle area every 200 to 1,000 years. 'We may be due one soon,' added Atwater.
However, until this year, the lesson of that tsunami was remembered only as a dim legend. Other such stories have been put to better use, however.
Last year's tsunami was also triggered by a strong earthquake, and around 300,000 people died. The Moken - or sea gypsies - of Thailand, however, have a tradition which warns that when tides recede far and fast, now known as a precursor of a tsunami, then a man-eating wave will soon head their way: so they should run far and fast. Last 26 December, they did - and survived.
Another example of the power of geomythology is from Patrick Nunn, of Fiji in the South Pacific. His studies of volcanoes on the Fijian island of Kadavu indicated they had not been active for tens of thousands of years.
'Then I heard legends of recent eruptions,' he told The Observer. 'I thought them unlikely. When a road was cut there in 2002, I found there had been a volcanic eruption long after it had been occupied by humans. It made me look at myths in a new light.'
Now, Nunn is working for the French government to compile tales that might pinpoint Pacific islands where scientists should look for warnings of earthquakes, volcanoes and catastrophic landslides.
These include stories of deities who fish up islands from the water and others in which they are thrown back into the sea.
'If you had asked me 10 years ago if there was value in local myths I would have said "not a lot",' added Nunn. 'Since then I have had a Pauline conversion.'
Posted by Groonk at 10:43 AM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Myth, Religion, Research, Science
Roman Catholics are Sneaky
Some of them anyway. Check out this argument on why, "Catholic believers would be the ideal people to engage in biogenetic manipulation":
According to a possible Roman Catholic counter-argument, the true danger is that, in engaging in biogenetics, we forget that we have immortal souls. This argument only displaces the problem, however. If this were the case, Catholic believers would be the ideal people to engage in biogenetic manipulation, since they would be aware that they were dealing only with the material aspect of human existence, not with the spiritual kernel. Their faith would protect them from reductionism. If we have an autonomous spiritual dimension, there is no need to fear biogenetic manipulation. --Slavoj Zizek, from 2003
'A' for argument effort but you're a long way from getting a gold star from me.
Try again.
(via warren ellis)
Posted by Groonk at 10:36 AM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Religion, Research, Science
December 05, 2005
Life's a Funny Thing...
...when a screenwriter puts into three sentences what I couldn't express in three paragraphs:
Rady: Spirituality is not religion. Religion divides people. Belief in something unites them.
"Flight of the Phoenix"
This one I came across in Google's daily quotes section. it was too good not to forget:
-- Tom Wolfe
Posted by Groonk at 03:01 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Quotables, Religion
November 11, 2005
Pat Robertson knows he's GOD
Last summer, he hit the headlines by calling for the assassination of leftist Venezuelan Present Hugo Chavez, one of President George W. Bush's most vocal international critics.
"I'd like to say to the good citizens of Dover: if there is a disaster in your area, don't turn to God, you just rejected Him from your city," Robertson said on his daily television show broadcast from Virginia, "The 700 Club."
Wow! Just...wow.
I mean...really?
You're kidding right?
Right?!?
(via warrenellis)
Posted by Groonk at 12:57 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Religion, USA
November 04, 2005
Cardinal Paul Poupard thinks, 'Science...maybe not such a bad thing'
The Vatican project was inspired by Pope John Paul II's 1992 declaration that the church's 17th-century denunciation of Galileo was an error resulting from "tragic mutual incomprehension." Galileo was condemned for supporting Nicolaus Copernicus' discovery that the Earth revolved around the sun; church teaching at the time placed Earth at the center of the universe.
"The permanent lesson that the Galileo case represents pushes us to keep alive the dialogue between the various disciplines, and in particular between theology and the natural sciences, if we want to prevent similar episodes from repeating themselves in the future," Poupard said.
But he said science, too, should listen to religion.
Always a catch, eh Cardinal?
And just so you know, It took over 350 years for the church to officially issue an apology to Galileo , thus lifting the edict of Inquisition against Galileo Galilei. That happened in 1992.
Another fun fact, this is what the current pope, Pope Benedict XVI, had to say about the church's past actions against Galileo in 1990.
(via 7d)
Posted by Groonk at 03:14 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Religion
November 01, 2005
The Mormon Cult Moment
MSNBC ran an article on the growing cult religion of LDS, that's Mormons to you and me.
It revealed a lot of things about the cult religion that I hadn't known before. And you know how I like to know things.
Wikipedia offers up even more background info.
And here's something I find especially interesting. The September Six are a group of men an women branded as feminists who were excommunicated from the LDS for basically challening the idea of the "assumptions of a male-only priesthood in the Church".
For something as simple as challenging the status quo they were kicked out of their faith.
Fascinating.
(via 7d)
Posted by Groonk at 10:48 AM | Comments (12) | Ministry of Religion
October 07, 2005
Florence, AL Church love to haze children "old school"
How this is not child endangerment I do not know.
"We need to be realistic about what the Bible says about fear and not be afraid to share our faith in school," youth minister Anthony Martin told the TimesDaily in a story Thursday. "We can't let that fear rule our lives."
Martin said the ministry's participants are between the ages of 14 and 21 and that they had to get their parents to sign a waiver to be involved.
[...]
"Through this ministry, kids are surrendering their lives to Jesus and developing a deeper relationship with Jesus," Martin said. "The method of the ministry that we use to bring people is going to change, but the message is going to stay consistent."
In teaching the lesson about fear, participants in last week's round were asked to pull a number - between one and three - from a bowl that would indicate how many live Comet goldfish would be swallowed.
Martin said 12 of the almost 20 young people who participated advanced to this week's round of activities, which involved undoing chains and getting out of a real coffin, with the eight fastest advancing. The final four will compete for $250 by the ministry's final week.
Where exactly in the bible did Jesus say to swallow a sack of goldfish?
What a tacky way to gain young parishioners.
(via 7d)
Posted by Groonk at 11:49 AM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Religion
President Bush says, "God made me do it"
In Elusive Peace: Israel and the Arabs, a major three-part series on BBC TWO (at 9.00pm on Monday 10, Monday 17 and Monday 24 October), Abu Mazen, Palestinian Prime Minister, and Nabil Shaath, his Foreign Minister, describe their first meeting with President Bush in June 2003.
Nabil Shaath says: "President Bush said to all of us: 'I'm driven with a mission from God. God would tell me, "George, go and fight those terrorists in Afghanistan." And I did, and then God would tell me, "George, go and end the tyranny in Iraq …" And I did. And now, again, I feel God's words coming to me, "Go get the Palestinians their state and get the Israelis their security, and get peace in the Middle East." And by God I'm gonna do it.'"
No. No. No!
Jake and Elwood were on a mission from God.
You are on a mission of vengeance. And as I understand it, "Vengeance is mine, saith the Lord".
Did He leave that out from your last chat? Or were you not listening?
Also, I hear the White House is denying the "God claim".
I know I've seen transcripts and watched video of the president saying that very thing to americans a few years ago. Unfortunately I didn't post on it. Fortunately I can't be bothered to google it.
(via boingboing)
Posted by Groonk at 05:58 AM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Politics, Religion
October 03, 2005
God Fucks Over Society
I've wanted scientific proof for decades. Now I have it.
The study counters the view of believers that religion is necessary to provide the moral and ethical foundations of a healthy society.
It compares the social peformance of relatively secular countries, such as Britain, with the US, where the majority believes in a creator rather than the theory of evolution. Many conservative evangelicals in the US consider Darwinism to be a social evil, believing that it inspires atheism and amorality.
Many liberal Christians and believers of other faiths hold that religious belief is socially beneficial, believing that it helps to lower rates of violent crime, murder, suicide, sexual promiscuity and abortion. The benefits of religious belief to a society have been described as its “spiritual capital”. But the study claims that the devotion of many in the US may actually contribute to its ills.
The paper, published in the Journal of Religion and Society, a US academic journal, reports: “Many Americans agree that their churchgoing nation is an exceptional, God-blessed, shining city on the hill that stands as an impressive example for an increasingly sceptical world.
“In general, higher rates of belief in and worship of a creator correlate with higher rates of homicide, juvenile and early adult mortality, STD infection rates, teen pregnancy and abortion in the prosperous democracies.
[...]
Mr Paul said: “The study shows that England, despite the social ills it has, is actually performing a good deal better than the USA in most indicators, even though it is now a much less religious nation than America.”
He said that the disparity was even greater when the US was compared with other countries, including France, Japan and the Scandinavian countries. These nations had been the most successful in reducing murder rates, early mortality, sexually transmitted diseases and abortion, he added.
Mr Paul delayed releasing the study until now because of Hurricane Katrina. He said that the evidence accumulated by a number of different studies suggested that religion might actually contribute to social ills. “I suspect that Europeans are increasingly repelled by the poor societal performance of the Christian states,” he added.
(via warren ellis)
Posted by Groonk at 05:32 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Religion, Research
September 29, 2005
Amusing Conversations with iGod
I grew bored after a minute, but Medicmike managed to amuse the fuck outta me.
Excerpts from Medicmike's chat:
God: Please don't be so rude.
Me: Please don't be so omnipotent.
God: Thanks for asking politely. I was not trying to be a omnipotent.
God:I would search for it. Have you tried looking in the Open Directory? I will try to find out..
God:I do not kill.
Me: You are a liar.
God: Yes, I have been known to bend the truth occasionally.
God: Yes I am the one and only devil.
Posted by Groonk at 01:38 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Apps, Flash, Religion
September 20, 2005
Jesusland is Rotting
Back in the day, around about late 1980s, Jim Bakker had the wonderful idea of starting up a funland where christians can go and have a wholesome good time. I actually remember seeing it on the news when it opened.
Look at it now:
You know, he could have used that spacious land to open a homeless shelter or provided a place for families down on their luck to live at relatively low prices. Instead he built a theme park designed to leech money from those who had money to burn.
Hell, the land still could be used for something like that now.
But I digress.
A photographer walked into Jesusland and took tons of photos.
(via boingboing)
Posted by Groonk at 04:55 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Photos2, Religion
August 30, 2005
Pastafarian
touched by "His Noodly Appendage"
The Flying Spaghetti Monster has been all over the net again lately. At least I keep running into it. Honestly, it creeps me right the fuck out.
So it's on par with all other religions.
(via boingboing)
Posted by Groonk at 01:35 PM | Comments (0) | Ministry of Religion