Michael Bay Out-Awesomes Himself, Makes TRANSFORMERS Sequel Blurrier, Boring


TRANSFORMERS2

THE QUICK
Never has so much movie been given to so many people for so very, very little story. I know Michael Bay has the emotional depth of a monster truck rally staged on an aircraft carrier while Raptors fly about firing missiles at Bigfoot and Gravedigger as they jump through metallic hoops of napalmed awesome. But did I have to pay 10 bucks for TRANSFORMERS 2 to confirm that he’s an asshole of the highest order?

In a mad attempt to prove he’s a more successful Uwe Boll, and by “successful” I mean ” people willingly put money on his movies every fucking time,” Michael Bay gave us TRANSFORMERS 2: REVENGE OF THE FALLEN. Two weeks and $200 million later, I’m pretty damn sure Bay will be given the keys to the outhouse and manage to crap out TRANSFORMERS 3.

*Sigh*

I can’t worry about that now. Today the focus is on ROTF.

What some would call spoilers but I call fair warning not to waste 10+ bucks follows: