Groonkly Bit : “And Also You Forgot”

Somehow inside the tendriled insanity that is this week’s Do Anything by Warren Ellis, I found coherency and decided to remember it for all time.

(…And inside, atop a rotting plinth that you belatedly realise is composed of the bodies of Len Wein’s Swamp Thing and Steve Gerber’s Man-Thing seized by cellular coma in the act of copulation, is Alan Moore on his ultradimensional stone throne, pointing an armoured finger at you and lurching forward and his scary atom eyes are burning into the front of your head as he says “There is no escape from structure. You are reading this inside a machine for living in, from a surface that is the end product of hundreds of years of industrial processes, and also you forgot –”)

Summer Reruns: The Double Volumes of Kill

The epic volumes of KILL BILL 1 and 2 gave me the chance to try out more simple animated ideas in 2003-2004. That idea being to butcher the brand with swordplay and paint the result in blood.

Well I tried.

Volume 1 offered the chance to re-create Tarantino‘s recreation of the color scheme originated by Bruce Lee. Playing with the 70s typeface was a trip. If you blink, you’ll miss the Hattori Hanzō affect the perfect kill-shot.

Summer Reruns: Go All the Way

In the not-so-distant past, I dabbled with animation. The times were young an frivolous. My experimentation was with animated gifs. Sure it was crude and sort of cheesy by today’s standards. Hell, it was cheesy back then. The only way you can grow is to expand and visit new shores.

The time was the Super Bowl XXXVIII halftime show. You know the thing that no one watches on TV. Ms Jackson sort of exposed a breast to the whole of the USA and parents got their tits in a twist. At the time a friend pondered if the uproar was because of a bare breast or because that bare breast was african american. That’s a debate for another post.

Adult Swim, in their salad days, aired a bump that re-created the scandal in ascii form. This gave me the idea to extend the thought to the next level.

Michael Bay Out-Awesomes Himself, Makes TRANSFORMERS Sequel Blurrier, Boring


Never has so much movie been given to so many people for so very, very little story. I know Michael Bay has the emotional depth of a monster truck rally staged on an aircraft carrier while Raptors fly about firing missiles at Bigfoot and Gravedigger as they jump through metallic hoops of napalmed awesome. But did I have to pay 10 bucks for TRANSFORMERS 2 to confirm that he’s an asshole of the highest order?

In a mad attempt to prove he’s a more successful Uwe Boll, and by “successful” I mean ” people willingly put money on his movies every fucking time,” Michael Bay gave us TRANSFORMERS 2: REVENGE OF THE FALLEN. Two weeks and $200 million later, I’m pretty damn sure Bay will be given the keys to the outhouse and manage to crap out TRANSFORMERS 3.


I can’t worry about that now. Today the focus is on ROTF.

What some would call spoilers but I call fair warning not to waste 10+ bucks follows:

GalactiGroonk: Now What???

It’s happened before.

It’ll happen again.

Gods help you if you’re not watching the final episodes of Battlestar Galactica. I hear random factions of The Internet may be unsatisfied with what they’re getting. I disagree with The Internet. With the exception of one episode, I’ve enjoyed the frak out of the final archival tapes.

If you’re more than a year behind, I can’t help you. If you, like me, wait with bated breath for the end of season four, the 21st century answer to missed shows has your backs. Hulu will beam BSG love into your personal computing devices.

But enough about that. Let’s talk splash pages. I won’t bore you with the back story on how long it took me to settle on an angle for this theme. I’ll only say that the minute the comics angle entered my brain, everything fell into place.

This splash will have only a few days showing in it’s full HTML glory. A certain movie release has asked to temporarily bump any small screen admiration off its pedestal for a short time.

Groonkly Bit: WWKBD?

You know, the internet might be a nicer place if, before posting anything, we asked ourselves: What would Kurt Busiek do? —Jens Altman

Quoting random comics people off their Twitters seems to be my theme these last few weeks.

Let’s see how long it lasts.

Groonkly Bit: A Story is a Story is a Tale is a Yarn

Also CNN and news media in general … if you’re going to write a story titled “Biff! Bam! Kapow! Comics aren’t just for kids anymore!” please rename it to “Patronizing Thoughts On A Medium I Only Know Stereotypes About Which I Happened To Acquire Decades Ago”.
—Ryan North, The Rant for November 13 2008.

Jorge F. Muñoz got me thinking on the Animation Age Ghetto again.


The Internet moves pretty fast. If I dare blink or put a find off until next week, the relevancy will be missed.

Shot during the writer’s strike last year, THE REMNANTS follows the lives of 5 strangers who’ve become friends in post-apocalypse LA. What I’ve gathered from this 11 minute pilot is:

John August wrote and directed this gem of a potential web series during the strike’s darkest hour. This may explain why everyone seems to click very nicely. It could also explain how he got so many fairly well known names to appear.

Show Tubes: The Indy Mogul Overload

From the depths of the Indy Mogul offices come their latest BFX test film: freeze face. And by film I mean music video with music provided by Keelay.

What is Indy Mogul?
They are young, gonzo filmmakers. They make, and show, other young filmmakers how to create cheap visual effects for their backyard films. Imagine what the world would have been like if Steven Spielberg had these tools available during his formative film years? Darren Aronofsky might have gotten the awesome of THE FOUNTAIN to our eyes a few years earlier. The creation catalyst potential is endless.

EriK Beck is your guide through: 1) talking about the special FX in question 2) showing a test film using said FX. It’s just that easy. Their blog features daily notices and I hear their forums are filled with its fare share of talented creators. They are basically super film geeks on a whole ‘nother level. That level being The Internet.

Sidenote: Another Indy Mogul favorite of mine is THE SPIRIT’S DAY OFF. It became so popular that they followed up with a behind the scenes look at that film. Let it be known that is about as close as I’ll get to watching The Spirit on film. That is until they do a reboot of the franchise 10 years later or when I’m liquored up late, on a Saturday night, and happen to land on an HBO viewing.

Indy Mogul also features…

The Best/Worst Overload to Keep You Busy

The year’s nowhere near over but the best/worst lists are piling up like week old laundry. I don’t have anything against such year end reviews. I just never made the time to see/watch/read/do all the things discussed on said lists. Any reviews I make would be damn incomplete. So I’ll rely on others to do my dirty work.* Then judge them appropriately when I find their results wrong.


Entertainment Weekly’s Best & Worst of 2008
It’s surprising how a crap magazine can get a few things right once in a while.


I’m tempted to pick up EW tomorrow for the HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER photoshoot. The entire cast acts out random moments in 2008. If the show were as cool as the cast seems to be, I’d still be watching HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER.

Pitchfork Media put forth two bits of bests so far. For those who don’t know, they’re the Indie Rock Pete of the online music media game. Bursting forth from the ashes of what Rolling Stone used to be, maybe 20 years ago, I look forward to running through their tracks to discover something new and majestic and not found easily on mainstream radio.